Closet Treats

Closet Treats


Reality is a slippery slope for Trey Leger, but he's managed to carve out a somewhat normal existence in spite of his mental illness.  But when an ice cream truck starts making the rounds of his neighborhood, Trey can no longer tell reality from his delusions.

 Listen to Promo

 

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Episode 01
Episode 02
Episode 03
Episode 04
Episode 05
Episode 06
Episode 07
Episode 08
 
Episode 09
Episode 10
Episode 11
Episode 12
Episode 13
Episode 14
Episode 15
Episode 16
Episode 17
Q&A Episode

Reggie has some competition...

Many of you have accused me of being a sick bastard for what I've done to your memories of muppets and The Ice Cream Man. Between "The Street" series and "Closet Treats," I've destroyed much of your childhoods. And I'll continue to do so. But dammit, no matter how hard I try someone keeps one-upping me. Don't believe this? Then check this link out. I've NEVER seen creepier easter bunnies. *shiver* Be very very afraid.

Closet Treats--New Cover

Here it is, Fiendlings. The new cover for the Closet Treats ebook and podcast. The great Starla Huchton got this together for me. I'm pretty happy with it. She's also going to be doing an alternate cover Tattoo in the near future before I saddle her with the final cover of the Garaaga's Children: Ancients Volume. 

Hope you like. And if you don't? Tough. You probably already bought the damned thing.

Cheers.

 

Essay-- Enter Tony Downs

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A few thoughts about Tony Downs and my most recent e-book releases "The Hunt" and "After Image".

The ebooks are available from Amazon, Smashwords, and BN.com

The Hunt:

After Image:

Music by Nine Nails from their album "The Slip." Please visit their site at NIN.com

It has begun...

Yup, it's begun.  As of today, I have already sent three query letters or full novel submissions.  Now we get to wait and see how long it takes for the rejection cycle to begin.

I've been asked why the hell I'm interested in getting published by a publishing company when I can obviously make more money and have more control over my work if I handle it myself.  In other words, why do I need a publisher?

This is a very good question.  The answer goes something like this.

  1. I can't afford a professional editor.  A good publishing company, one I want to publish my books with, has an editorial staff that should be able to help in polishing the manuscript.  While there are freelancers available for this chore, they typically cost cash that I simply don't have.  I want to put out the best possible product and that requires some professional help.
  2. Layout.  I need help with laying out the book properly. While I may put Tattoo and the Fiends collection out as a book via Createspace or some other POD service, Closet Treats deserves a chance to be professionally edited and packaged.  Again, I can't afford a professional artist or professional layout services.  I know plenty of people capable of the artwork and layout, but again, I believe Closet Treats deserves the best.
  3. Price.  I hope that my books will be priced at a fair amount for fiendlings to purchase.  Although I'm still looking at the cost of a POD like Createspace, POD books are typically much more expensive than books in the bookstore.
  4. Distribution.  Createspace claims to work through certain book distributors that will get your novel into bookstores.  Although I believe bookstores are a dying model, Barnes and Noble and other brick and mortar stores stil provide a significant presence for authors.  In addition to having your book on the shelves, it makes it much easier for a self-funded signing tour or other such PR efforts.
  5. Bona Fides.  I believe we will ultimately bypass the publishing gate-keepers.  Those who consider new media as nothing more than a vanity distribution mechanism for authors who aren't good enough to "make it" in the traditional markets are foolish at best, myopic at worst.  Have no doubt-- the market is changing and changing quickly.  But until this happens, having an actual "respected" publishing company at your back is the only way to qualify for certain awards or reaching the NYT.

These are the main reasons I have for pursuing relations with a publisher for Closet Treats rather than doing it myself.  But rest assured, if I don't find a publisher in the future, Closet Treats will definitely be destined for a different route.  Stay tuned.  Maybe I'll have some good luck.  And I hope that if it happens, you fiendlings will be ready with your wallets open, and smiles on your fanged faces.

 

Cheers.

Fiends--Closet Treats-QandA

Well, here it is:  answers to your questions about Closet Treats, at least those I could answer.  Thank you  to JP and Stephanie Harvey for doing the interview and all those that attended!

 

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 17

I challenged you Fiendlings on Sunday night via twitter and facebook to purchase 30 copies of the Tattoo e-book.  If you succeeded, I would release episode 17 early.  Like Tuesday early.  Well, you failed.  But you know what?  Your tried so damned hard that I had to get this out.  So enjoy the epilogue.

 

Closet Treats...The Finale? Schedule?

 I have a question for you fiendlings.  I wanted to wait until Balticon to release the final episode of CT.  However, it dawned on me that if I want to record the Q&A at Balticon, then I kind of need to get the damned thing out there so y'all have time to ask questions.

So here's the deal.  If we sell 30 more copies of the Tattoo e-book either by smashwords.com or amazon.com (combined), then I'll release it Tuesday.  Otherwise, I'll release it on Thursday night and you'll just have to deal with it.

Now...GO!

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 16

Here it is.  Episode 16.  I spoil you fiendlings with these early releases.  Enjoy.  Leave comments in the q&a.  DO EET! 

 

 

Please go to Amazon.com and/or Smashwords.com and get your ebook copy of Tattoo for $.99. That's right, 99 cents! Or you can also rate and review and help me find new listeners/readers.

I have written a story for Scott Sigler's "The Crypt" collection.  If you haven't heard "The Crypt" yet, you better go and listen before my story airs in May.

Thank you, James Durham for doing the bump. Go check out his fantastic podiobook FETIDUS.

Discover David J Williams' final book in the Autumn Rain trilogy.

 

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 15

 It's that time of week again.  The time for me to bust a cap in your ass with the latest episode of Closet Treats.  Getcha some!

 

"Hospitals and Questions"

Please go to Amazon.com and/or Smashwords.com and get your ebook copy of Tattoo for $.99. That's right, 99 cents! Or you can also rate and review and help me find new listeners/readers.

I have written a story for Scott Sigler's "The Crypt" collection.  If you haven't heard "The Crypt" yet, you better go and listen before my story airs in May.

Go visit Variant Frequencies and get your ears on some of the best podiofiction out there.

Check out Jennifer Hudock's short stories on amazon.com and smashwords.com.

PC Haring's "Cybrosis" is a great podiobook you should be checking out!

...And The World Didn't End

 I think I said this before, hell think I included it in episode 14 podcast, but I have submitted query letters to two publishers.  Both were sort of solicited, meaning I was invited to submit my work.  One of them is with an editor I've had many conversations with and whom I respect.  Neither of us was sure whether or not Closet Treats was right for her company, but we both decided to give it a go.

Turns out, CT doesn't quite fit.  I received the kindest, most helpful "rejection" letter of my life.  Exactly what was needed, I think, to try and get over the shitty experience I had back in '95.  Back in the saddle again.  I'm going to ride this bronco for a couple of months.  If no one wants my damned book after that, then it'll be time to pull a Scott Sigler and just DO IT.

The world didn't end.  I'm not swirling in deep depression.  I am, in fact, rather happy.  Strange, but true.  Why?  Because I got great advice and managed to establish a relationship with someone in the biz.  That is the best sort of experience I could have realistically hoped for.  And I'm damned glad I took the chance and did it.

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 14

 You ungrateful fiendlings demanded it early, so here it is.  Download episode 14. We're getting close to the end folks!

"Sleepless"

I am putting out the Fiends short story collection on smashwords.com FOR FREE!  Please do me a favor, download them, read them, and rate them. When they come out on amazon.com, b&n.com, and the iTunes store, I'll need you to do the same.   Leave obnoxious comments.  Whatever.  BE HONEST.  These are the gateway drug stories to get money for Tattoo.  So when Tattoo goes up, it'll be on sale for $.99.  I hope you will be willing to help get me going.

I have written a story for Scott Sigler's "The Crypt" collection.  If you haven't heard "The Crypt" yet, you better go and listen before my story airs in May.

Go to Seth Harwood's site and pre-order your copy of Seth Harwood's awesome novel "Young Junius."  It's going to be made of awesome.  DO EET!

Thank you Alex White for doing the bump.  Check out his novel The Gearheart!

Shadowpublications.com is hosted by CompleteComputing.com.  Visit http://completecomputing.com/sp to get a customized quote for hosting.

 

 

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 13

 Yes, because I am made of awesome, I'm early again!  Download episode 13 and get ready for one hell of a ride!

"The Warehouse"

I am putting out the Fiends short story collection on smashwords.com FOR FREE!  Please do me a favor, download them, read them, and rate them. When they come out on amazon.com, b&n.com, and the iTunes store, I'll need you to do the same.   Leave obnoxious comments.  Whatever.  BE HONEST.  These are the gateway drug stories to get money for Tattoo.  So when Tattoo goes up, it'll be on sale for $.99.  I hope you will be willing to help get me going.

I have written a story for Scott Sigler's "The Crypt" collection.  If you haven't heard "The Crypt" yet, you better go and listen before my story airs in May.

On May 5th, go to Seth Harwood's site and pre-order your copy of Seth Harwood's awesome novel "Young Junius."  It's going to be made of awesome.  DO EET!

Thank you Thomas Reed for doing the bump.  Check out his work!

Shadowpublications.com is hosted by CompleteComputing.com.  Visit http://completecomputing.com/sp to get a customized quote for hosting.

 

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 12

Because I love you, here's Episode 12.

I am putting out the Fiends short story collection on smashwords.com FOR FREE!  Please do me a favor, download them, read them, and rate them. When they come out on amazon.com, b&n.com, and the iTunes store, I'll need yo uto do the same.   Leave obnoxious comments.  Whatever.  BE HONEST.  These are the gateway drug stories to get money for Tattoo.  So when Tattoo goes up, it'll be on sale for $.99.  I hope you will be willing to help get me going.

I have written a story for Scott Sigler's "The Crypt" collection.  If you haven't heard "The Crypt" yet, you better go and listen before my story airs in May.

  The Crypt

"Closet Treats" episode 12.

Written and performed by Paul Elard Cooley featuring original music written and performed by Andrew Richardson.
You can find Mr. Richardson's podcasts and music at: http://www.fabkebab.com
This presentation is copyright 2010 by Paul Elard Cooley.
Visit shadowpublications.com for more free stories as well as my rant casts.
Contact me at:

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. To view a copy of this license, visit creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/us/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 171 Second Street, Suite 300, San Francisco, California, 94105, USA.

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 11

Because I love you, my wonderful fiendlings, here is the next episode.

I have written a story for Scott Sigler's "The Crypt" collection. If you haven't heard "The Crypt" yet, you better go and listen before my story airs in May.

The Crypt: http://www.scottsigler.com/taxonomy/reverse/71

 

Promos included in this episode:

Closet Treats Q&A: POST HERE!

 You got questions about "Closet Treats?"  Found a fuck-up?  Want to berrate the FiendMaster for making you listen to this?  Do you see the Ice Cream Man in your sleep?  Well, post your complaints here.

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 10

That's right, my Fiendlings.  Here's episode 10 chock full of fiendy goodness.

This episode includes promos for Seth Harwood's Young Junius.  May 5th is Cinco De Harwood, the day you have a chance to get your little paws on a special order custom copy of the book.  Check it out, fiendlings.

Also, last week I screwed the pooch and forgot to give props to Vertigo Radio Live and their fantastic insanity.  Please check out their show.  It's hilarious, irreverant, and fun for your little gray cells.

Last but not least, your fellow fiendling David Sobkowiak is putting out his first podcast novel with co-creator Laura Frechette.  Go check it out on Monday!

 

 

 

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 09

Happy Freakin' Easter, Fiendlings!

Because it's Good Friday, I'm kicking this out early, because you've been so good this week.  Or bad.  Or, whatever.  Regardless, here it is for your enjoyment.

Thank you to John Mierau for this week's bump.  Please check out his work!

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 08

Once again, my wonderful fiendlings, I am early. Way fucking early. So quit your bitching and enjoy Episode 08.

Remember to pre-order Scott Sigler's "The Starter" on Aprii 1st.

 

 

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 07

 Well, bitches, here I am, more than 20 hours early!  Your FiendMaster obviously loves you more than you can possibly understand.  Of course he loathes you too.  But that's not important.

What's important is that you enjoy the episode and check out Drew Beatty's Lost Gods and remember to pre-order Scott Sigler's "The Starter" on Aprii 1st.

Cheers, Fiendlings!

 

Essay--Fear of Publishing

 A brief essay on publishing and why it led me to stop writing...

 

Promo at the end of the episode for Scott Sigler's "The Starter."  Visit http://scottsigler.com and get ready to pre-order your copy April 1st!

 

Written and performed by Paul Elard Cooley.

Music by Nine Inch Nails from their album:  The Slip.  Please visit their site at http://nin.com

This presentation is copyright 2010 by Paul Elard Cooley.

Visit shadowpublications.com for more free stories as well as my rant casts.

Contact me at:

 

    * Email: stories@shadowpublications.com

    * twitter: http://twitter.com/paul_e_cooley

    * facebook: http://facebook.com/paul.e.cooley

Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 06

Alan and Carolyn deal with Trey's first night away...

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Fiends--Closet Treats-Episode 04

Yup, I rock.  Episode 04 is out early.  This episode is bumped by Jason of Shadow Cast Audio.  Be sure and subscribe to the podcast for weekly horror goodies.  And yes, I am narrating their episode next week.  Should be fun.

Leave comments for this episode please.  Cheers.

Closet Treats--Podiobooks.com Release!

Closet Treats will be released on Podiobooks.com this Friday.  So if you want to get the book without the intro babble, this is the place to go.  I'm going to try like hell to keep the two in synch, although it may take a day or two for the latest episode to show up there.  But tell your fellow fiendlings:  Closet Treats  is the FOR REALEST!

Cheers.

Fiends--Closet Treats-03

Here ya go, Fiendlings.  Just a little early for your enjoyment.  Episode 3 of Closet Treats.  Download it and getcha some!

 

INFOCAST 2010-02-18: Closet Treats and Pimpage

Real quick update on what's going and the schedule for the book.  Also, a plea for Fiendling action.

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Fiends--Closet Treats-02

My fiendlings.  Today is Day 3 of "The Valentine's Day Massacre" Weekend.  Today I offer up episode 2 of my new podiobook novel, Closet Treats.  Hope you enjoy it. 

Download Now

 

 

Written and performed by Paul Elard Cooley featuring original music written and performed by Andrew Richardson.
You can find Mr. Richardson's podcasts and music at: http://www.fabkebab.com
This presentation is copyright 2010 by Paul Elard Cooley.
Visit shadowpublications.com for more free stories as well as my rant casts.
Contact me at:

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. To view a copy of this license, visit creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/us/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 171 Second Street, Suite 300, San Francisco, California, 94105, USA.

Fiends--Closet Treats-01

My fiendlings.  Today is Day 2 of "The Valentine's Day Massacre" Weekend.  Brought to you by: me and my sick and twisted brain.  Today I offer up the premiere episode of my new podiobook novel, Closet Treats.  Hope you enjoy it.  Episode 2 drops tomorrow.

Download Now

 

 

Written and performed by Paul Elard Cooley featuring original music written and performed by Andrew Richardson.
You can find Mr. Richardson's podcasts and music at: http://www.fabkebab.com
This presentation is copyright 2010 by Paul Elard Cooley.
Visit shadowpublications.com for more free stories as well as my rant casts.
Contact me at:

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. To view a copy of this license, visit creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/us/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 171 Second Street, Suite 300, San Francisco, California, 94105, USA.

Closet Treats--Promo

It's the promo for the novel, folks.  ENJOY.

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